Dear Kendall and Rihanna,
Hi, guys. I'm a huge fan of your work and follow, like, everything you do, which is why I'm going to have to ask you to stop wearing denim mini skirts. I'm sorry to launch right into it, but I don't think we're ready for a comeback. Not yet.
Kendall, you just broke a major Instagram record—your influence is undeniable. If you go around posting photos like this with the caption "check out my mini," your 30 million followers are gonna check it out and then they're all gonna run to the closest store to get one for themselves! We can't let this happen.
While you were too young for their most recent go-around, let me tell you—they were everywhere.
From book launches to red carpets, the stars of the early 2000s found opportunities to wear them whenever they could. Kendall, we could see a full-blown 2004 renaissance if we're not careful—it's up to you.
That brings us to you, Rihanna. While we've already acknowledged that you are leading the pack when it comes to bringing the fashion of the early aughts to 2015, this is where I have to put my foot down.
This photo is from 2005, but I fear something like it could be on the horizon if you don't remove all denim skirts—no matter how ~unfinished~ they are—from your closet. I mean, what's next, a lace-trimmed camisole?! We can't. We've come so far.
Please, Rihanna—we're at a crossroads here and I'm imploring you to make the right decision. I can't walk into a store and buy another denim mini skirt, I just don't have it in me (plus, I, like, just threw my ones from high school away, but that's besides the point!!!!!).
Please consider my request—I look forward to seeing y'all out and about on the street in anything but a denim skirt.