Ray Tamarra/Getty Images

Rebel Wilson Perfectly Shut Down Rumors That She’s Lying About Her Name And Age

OMG, BREAKING NEWS: SHE'S ACTAULLY A MERMAID!

What do we really know about the blonde, boisterously joyous Rebel Wilson? That’s the question currently under investigation, thanks to some incriminating (and likely bogus) reports from Australian news outlets that claim the “Pitch Perfect 2” star is lying about her age and details of her upbringing.

On Tuesday, Sydney Morning Herald published a story claiming Wilson is 35, not 29, as she claims. Yes, that’s a whopping six-year age difference, which is pretty startling. The day before, Australia’s Woman’s Day reported that Wilson’s birth name is actually Melanie Elizabeth Bownds, and her age is actually 36.

So. What we have here are a few conflicting reports. Is Rebel 29, 35, or a 36-year-old named Melanie? Honestly, none of this really matters because Rebel’s personal life is none of our business, but she responded to the allegations flawlessly, with a pair of tongue-in-cheek tweets.

Referring to the Australian slang term “tall poppy syndrome” — in which people cut others down to make them feel better about themselves — Rebel shut down the gossipers and reminded us all what REALLY matters at the end of the day: you can’t fake talent and hilarity. Well played!