Every girl dreams of having an awesomely over-the-top party on their sixteenth birthday -- but the heroines of young adult literature aren't like other girls. Literally, that's sometimes their defining character trait. And a whole bunch of them are too busy being almost killed on a daily basis to even think about the possibility of a birthday, which is just a real shame.
Well, it's about time that some of our favorite book and movie characters got the chance to let loose! Here's how we imagine Katniss, Hermione, and other YA heroines would choose to celebrate their super sweet sixteen:
Tris Prior, "Divergent"
What The Party's Like: Lots of black decorations, strobe lights and intense rhythmic music -- a staple of any Dauntless get together. There will also be kickboxing lessons, shortly followed by ridiculously glam makeovers.
Extravagant Present: A tattoo, which will be applied on her body as everyone at the party watches so they know just how much of a badass she is.
What The Tantrum's About: Over having to invite that stupid jerk Peter.
Teresa Agnes, "The Maze Runner"
What The Party's Like: "Wizard Of Oz" themed, with green decorations everywhere. Get it? Because she's so into WICKED? Aaaah? C'mon, it's funny.
Extravagant Present: Seven minutes alone in a closet with Thomas.
What The Tantrum's About: Her party is a total sausage fest and all the Gladers keeps hitting on her.
Hermione Granger, "Harry Potter"Warner Bros.
What The Party's Like: Like the Yule Ball but fancier -- everyone dressed in their best wizarding robes, an appearance by the Weird Sisters, and so much treacle fudge. Also her parents are there and they totally remember that they have a daughter and EVERYONE IS HAPPY, OKAY?
Extravagant Present: The oldest book in Wizarding history. She will have to decipher a dead language in order to read it. She is very excited about this.
What The Tantrum's About Blowing up at Ron for forgetting that you can't apparate on Hogwarts grounds for the 557th time (but she's actually mad that he forgot to send flowers).
Bella Swan, "Twilight"
What The Party's Like: Bella doesn't know. Alice planned all of it and Bella has too difficult a time making eye contact with anybody but Edward to notice what's going on.
Extravagant Present: The fanciest Volvo that money can buy!
What The Tantrum's About: Jacob, probably.
Katniss Everdeen, "The Hunger Games"Lionsgate
What The Party's Like: Everyone sits around and refuses to talk about their feelings. There is punch.
Extravagant Present: Food. Maybe some new arrows. Katniss is devastatingly practical.
What The Tantrum's About: Over having to be the center of attention in the first place.
Hazel Grace Lancaster, "The Fault In Our Stars"
What The Party's Like: It's Amsterdam themed -- but, you know, in a classy way. Less weed-smoking and more centerpieces with tasteful tulip arrangements.
Extravagant Present: A speaking role in the "An Imperial Affliction" movie that's probably definitely getting made (hey, "TFIOS" got one, didn't it?), and the actress who plays the leading role of Anna drops in on the party. Book author Peter Van Houten does not. He is a jerk.
What The Tantrum's About: One too many people asks her about which colleges she's applying to once she's done with the chemotherapy and she loses it.
Lyra Belacqua, "The Golden Compass"
What The Party's Like: The Great Hall at Christ Church College in Oxford is decked in silver garlands (for "Silvertongue," obviously), and all the Gyptians in England are invited.
Extravagant Present: a ferret made of gold. Pantalaimon finds it a wonderful likeness.
What The Tantrum's About: Lyra's mom Ms. Coulter crashes the party and starts asking all of her younger guests what their family situation is like and if anyone would miss them should they suddenly disappear for no reason.
What The Party's Like: Miss Honey rents out the Liberty Science Center for a day, and everyone gets a slice of the biggest chocolate cake imaginable.
Extravagant Present: Neil DeGrasse Tyson and Bill Nye bestow on her an honorary "smartest person alive" certificate and then watch in amazement as she ties Bill's bowtie with her mind.
What The Tantrum's About: Come on, has Matilda ever had a tantrum in her entire life?
Cassia Reyes, "Matched"
What The Party's Like: Exactly the same as every other sixteen year old's birthday party in the Society, of course.
Extravagant Present: A new pill that you have to keep on your person at all times! Wheeeee!
What The Tantrum's About: Ky can't come because he's an Abberation and Cassia's pretty bummed about it.
Meg Murray, "A Wrinkle In Time"Disney
What The Party's Like: Mrs. Who, Mrs. Which and Mrs. Whatsit take the Murray family to a far off planet in an alternate reality where everything is made out of birthday cake.
Extravagant Present: The gifts of the people of Uriel are strange and noncorporal, so Meg's just probably going to end up getting something. She kinda wanted a car, but that works too.
What The Tantrum's About: Calvin gets kidnapped by aliens or something and Meg has to go save him AGAIN. This is supposed to be her special day, dude!
Mia Thermopolis, "The Princess Diaries"
What The Party's Like: Given that Mia is heir to the throne of Genovia, it's the classiest gala of all time. So like a normal Friday night for Mia at this point.
Extravagant Present: Probably like a shetland pony made of diamonds from the President of Switzerland. Whatever.
What The Tantrum's About: Grandmère' flies into a rage when Mia's best friend Lily starts passing around a coffee can marked "SAVE THE WHALES" and asking various Heads of State if they'll contribute.
Harriet, "Harriet The Spy"
What The Party's Like: OBVIOUSLY SPY THEMED. Everyone gets a codename and secret mission before entering the building and must complete their objective.
Extravagant Present: Poker lessons from Daniel Craig. He lets her win.
What The Tantrum's About: Someone discovers Harriet's secret Twitter account where she gossips about all of them, and she screams until everyone at the party agrees not to follow her.
Georgia Nicolson, "Angus, Thongs and Full-Frontal Snogging"
What The Party's Like: Georgia and her friends -- okay, her boyfriends -- play biggest game of Spin the Bottle you have ever seen in your entire life.
Extravagant Present: A cat-sized tiara for Angus, and thousands of dollars worth of lingerie to help her reign in her "bazoombas."
What The Tantrum's About: Somebody brings up the dreaded Eyebrow Incident.
Clary Fray, "The Mortal Instruments"
What The Party's Like: Simon, Luke, her mom, and Jace all sit around playing board games until a hoard of Eidolon demons crash the party. That's when the fun really begins.
Extravagant Present: An awesome pair of Seraph blades.
What The Tantrum's About: Jace said something stupid and arrogant, as per usual.
Jo March, "Little Women"
What The Party's Like: The entire town is invited to watch one of Jo's plays, as put on by her sisters and childhood friend Laurie.
Extravagant Present: A brand new typewriter.
What The Tantrum's About: Amy refuses to read her lines as written and keeps improvising, which messes up the whole narrative flow of the play.
Margo Roth Spiegelman, "Paper Towns"
What The Party's Like: All of the most popular kids are invited to attend in their fanciest, most expensive apparel, and then one by one their dress hems and ties are mysteriously shredded by a team of expert pranksters whom no one ever sees.
Extravagant Present: Vengeance. Sweet, sweet vengeance.
What The Tantrum's About: Margo is not even actually at the party because she is hiding in a barn.