Jerks. We've all met them. Most of us have dated one (or more). Occasionally dating the wrong person can be a fun detour, but exclusively dating people who treat you badly? That can have a huge impact on how you approach relationships and hinder your pursuit of healthy ones. Here's how to know when you've had enough:
You've loaned multiple romantic partners money (and they expect it)
You want to be giving in your relationships, but when it literally means paying someone else's bills, it's only a matter of time before it feels a little gross. Being broke does not automatically make them jerks -- acting entitled to your hard-earned cash does.
Booty calls are the only dates you seem to go on
You get that booty calls are not technically dates, but you're also happy being asked to hang out at all. Any jerk can ask you for a casual hookup, but if that's not exactly what you want, say no. They've definitely heard it before.
You only ever get to stay over for part of the night
Hooking up is tiring, and letting someone crash afterward should be a common courtesy. If you have to ask permission to stay at his place, don't go over there in the first place.
You treat a glass of water like it's a present
It's the most basic refreshment, not an Academy Award. You don't have to thank anyone.
"Sorry" is your safe word
Studies have shown that women apologize more than men. (A recent Pantene ad campaign even called out women for saying sorry too much.) But a romantic partner should make you feel accepted and comfortable. If you feel like you have to apologize for every little thing, he might be the one who's actually at fault.
Phone calls from dudes seem like accidents
In her upcoming movie "Trainwreck," Amy Schumer assumes a call is a butt-dial after dating too many d-bags. That is all too familiar.
When someone says "everyone cheats," you kind of believe them
Contrary to popular belief, cheating is not like pooping — everyone does not do it. You've likely been conditioned to believe this by a series of unfaithful jerks, but there are plenty of guys out there with self-control in the keeping-it-in-their-pants department.
It's easier to fake it with these guys than to talk about it
Female orgasms are complicated. Some women go their entire lives without having one, even if they're in healthy relationships. If you haven't (and if you're unsure, then you probably haven't), that's totally OK. But if your partners haven't tried to address that -- or even noticed it -- it's questionable how much of a partnership this really is.
Your friends don't get excited anymore when you meet someone new
You can tell a lot from your friends' reactions. They often know you better than you know yourself, so if they're rolling their eyes (again), it's probably not jealousy.
You can't imagine being attracted to the type of guy you'd be friends with
Sure, plenty of guys are more “friend material” than “boyfriend material.” But disqualifying a dude for being too comfortable to be around only does yourself a disservice. You don't need romance to sustain a platonic relationship, but you definitely need a friendship to build a healthy romantic one.