But Seriously, We Actually Must Have A 'The Fault In Our Stars' Prequel Right Now

No fooling, we need this.

Earlier this week, "The Fault in Our Stars" fans everywhere were elated, and then devastated, when John Green's Australian publisher announced that the author was officially penning a prequel to the bestselling novel about the romance between two cancer-stricken teenagers.

Elated, because YES, MOAR AUGUSTUS WATERS!

And devastated, because APRIL FOOL'S.

John Green, bless his heart, tried to nip this tragedy in the bud by gently reminding his Twitter followers not to believe everything they read on the internet on or around April 1.

But it's too late, John. The seed has been sown. The die has been cast. The fault is not in our stars, but IN YOUR FACE, which should be shut indoors working on this prequel RIGHT FREAKING NOW. The followup to "The Fault in Our Stars" simply has to happen. Here's why:

We've been curious about Gus's ex-girlfriend since forever

The details of Gus's relationship with Caroline Mathers, who is long dead by the time we meet him in "The Fault in Our Stars," have always been a fascinating mystery. Getting to see them together, alive, on the page, would make for a guaranteed bestseller.

It means more Ansel Elgort in that adorable Pacers jersey

If a prequel were in the works, then a movie adaptation would be a foregone conclusion, which means Ansel Elgort would have to come back to reprise the role of Augustus.

And hey, what about Isaac?

This compelling supporting character never got anywhere near enough spotlight in the original novel. A second book could give him the attention he deserves.

Plus, resurrecting a beloved character from the grave is a totally classic, and classy, move

Forget the whole "prequel" idea; how about a sequel? If Arthur Conan Doyle could bring Sherlock Holmes back from the the dead, then John Green can do it with Augustus. YES HE CAN. DO IT.