Once upon a time Lizzie McGuire was like our wise older sister. She taught us everything we needed to know about growing up, from first crushes (we're still swooning over Ethan Craft), to navigating middle school social hierarchies and dealing with mean girls.
But nothing has stuck with us quite like Lizzie's ill-fated night at Kate's "14th" birthday party. (We can all agree Kate was 15, right?) In fact, we learned so much from this episode of "Lizzie McGuire," we decided to break it down in a handy-dandy listicle for a quick-n-easy refresher on birthday party etiquette. Because you don't want to be #rude -- or get unexpectedly caught in a mosh pit.
Don't RSVP just for the goodie bags.
Trust us: a free cell phone isn't worth it.
No chaperone, no party.
Lizzie probably should have listened to her mom and not gone to Kate's party. Why? Because Kate's cousin -- AKA Haylie Duff -- was the worst chaperone ever. Pro tip: don't be in a rush to grow up.
Lying to your parents will backfire.
Either you'll get caught in the lie, or the guilt will eat away at you until you just can't take it any more.
Listen to your subconscious.
If Lizzie was having "second, third and fourth" doubts about sneaking out to Kate's party, maybe she should have listened to herself? Just a thought.
Always bring a friend.
Use the buddy system and stick together.
Dance floors can be dangerous.
Lizzie learned this one the hard way. So maybe wear comfortable shoes next time?
Do tell the birthday girl "happy birthday."
What are you? Some kind of animal? If someone went out of their way to invite you to a party, you should at least tell them happy birthday.
You only get seven minutes in heaven -- no more, no less.
Taking any more time than that is so #RUDE.
Don't let your selfish cousin order your cake.
Kate wanted chocolate, not strawberry, okay?!
Don't slam the birthday girl's head into the cake.
Not cute. Also, #rude.
Frosting won't hide your tears.
When in doubt, just eat the cake.
Feeling awkward? Eat cake! At least you're busy doing something, right?
If you're not having a good time, just leave early.
Why prolong your misery when you can just leave?
Make new friends.
Lizzie and Kate were almost friends for a hot minute. ALMOST.
If all else fails, call your mom.
Mrs. McGuire handled that mess. "I am your worst nightmare," indeed.
Giant cookie > birthday cake
Always and forever.