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Mindy Kaling’s TV Character Is Sabotaging Her Love Life

No, dudes, Mindy is not that kind of girl.

You would think that being an A-list celeb with your own TV show would pretty much guarantee an impeccable dating life, but according to Mindy Kaling, that’s not quite the case.

During an appearance on “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” that aired Wednesday (March 11), Kaling confirmed she’s single but admitted that dating is extra difficult for her. The reason? Guys keep expecting her to be like her “The Mindy Project” character, Mindy Lahiri (it probably doesn’t help that they share a first name, huh?).

“I am dating but one of the challenges I have noticed is that I’m not very much like my character, who is very wild,” the 35-year-old explained. “And I think that when I go on dates there’s this expectation that I’m going to have like 11 martinis and like pass out and spend the night really soon.”

While her onscreen counterpart is a vivacious extrovert who says things like “I figure if I'm gonna be a mess, I might as well be a hot mess,” Kaling insists she's more of a homebody and not a one-night-stand kinda gal.

“I think people get a little disappointed because my true self is like, I could never do that — have a one-night stand,” she admitted. “Because I have my medications that I have to take at night and I have to be at my house and do my flossing. I have all that stuff. Maybe you didn’t want to know that!”

Kaling went on to describe her hilariously assorted spectrum of pillows and her carefully-organized pillbox, which she said is “for the elderly. I have my little Monday-through-Sunday box. So, these are the kinds of sexy stories that guys really like to hear.”

Thankfully, DeGeneres decided to look out for Kaling's best interests by surprising her with a bedazzled pill box that doubles as a purse, so she won’t have to be embarrassed by bringing it to guys' houses.

Gentlemen, please form an orderly queue to woo Kaling while she’s still single, because we all know that won’t be for long. And please remember that Dr. Mindy Lahiri is a fictional character (duh).