Dating is like being Goldilocks: Some men are too self-centered, some are too self-sabotaging ... and a few are just right. Are you with one of those few, or did you stop your search as soon as you sat down in the first chair?
Tonight on "Guy Code," the cast is talking about settling. Here are signs that you're doing just that with this relationship. If any of these ring true, perhaps it’s time to face the unfortunate truth that you deserve so much better.
When you talk about him to your friends, you’re usually complaining
Even in the best of relationships, there will be times when venting to your girls about him is oh so necessary. That said, if most of your stories about him start with an annoyed sigh, do yourself and everyone you know a favor, and find someone who’s worth bragging about.
You have a never-ending list of ways you plan on fixing him
Unlike in real estate, there is no such thing as a boyfriend “fixer upper.” What you see is what you get. No amount of nagging or shopping for him is going to change who he is. Stop trying to date “future him,” and make this guy a part of your past.
Your last birthday, anniversary and Valentine’s Day all kind of sucked
Not every special event needs to be a home run, but if a duddy birthday was preceded by a drive-thru Valentine’s dinner, which was preceded by an anniversary spent watching him at band practice, ditch this dude and know that brighter days lie ahead.
You lie to your friends about your sex life
So-so sex is one of the biggest signs that a relationship is hardly worth continuing, but it can be embarrassing to admit that your love life is about as steamy as a bag of frozen broccoli. If you lie to your girls about how often you guys do it, or how good it is when you do, it’s time to be honest with yourself about where this is really headed. Make way for someone who can actually make you scream.
You’ve convinced yourself that no one is really happy in their relationship
It’s true that some of a new relationship's heat cools over time, but a guy who’s really a catch will keep you happy and satisfied indefinitely. Don’t use the fact that some of your friends are also in dull relationships to justify staying in this one. Just because they’re settling doesn’t mean you have to. Find something better than your mutual dissatisfaction to bond with them over.
You idealize your ex
Idealizing an ex (assuming he's your ex for a reason) is less about the actual ex and more about you yearning for a time when you weren’t in a romantic relationship with an emotional simpleton. If you’re constantly comparing your current man to the one who you told to go away, you know on some level that it’s time to make your current boyfriend a permanent ex.
You’ve thought about how you would break up with him
Have you had the conversation in your head already? Do you know where all of your belongings are in his house, just in case you need to grab them abruptly? Then half of the work is already done! Finish the job so you can use that mental energy to focus on your next conquest.
You have a child, and it’s your boyfriend
You and your man should be a team — and not in a “mother/son relay race” way. Giving him a little extra TLC when he’s had a rough day is a thoughtful gesture; doing his laundry, monitoring what he’s eating and reminding him to make a dentist appointment is hell for both of you. Take care of yourself by being with a man who can take care of his own business.
Your dad hates him
This may come as a bitter pill to swallow, but your dad really does know best. Believe it or not, he was a dude once (and still is!), so he has a solid d-bag radar and isn’t going to welcome some subpar excuse for a man into his home. Lose this guy. Also, get an oil change or whatever else Pops is on your case about.
Watch "Guy Code" tonight on MTV2 at 11/10C