Helena Lovincic

9 Attractive Things About Sober People

You know what's hot? Not being a mess.

Plenty of people don't drink, and their sobriety is motivated by many factors -- from personal health goals to self-betterment challenges such as Drynuary and legitimate addiction concerns.

But what abstainers have in common, since dating so often involves alcohol, is that they present an appealing alternative to the over-served norm. Whether you drink, don't drink or are considering drying up for your own reasons, it's time we appreciate the many swoon-worthy qualities that sober people can bring to the table.

  1. They're more creative with dates

    People who don't drink also don't have the luxury of asking you to "grab a drink." This forces them to think outside the bar, so you're more likely to have a memorable adventure together ... and not simply because you won't be drinking away your short-term memory on this date.

  2. They're conscious of their physical health...

    Being sober doesn't necessarily mean you're a health nut, but if you aren't drinking, then chances are you don't treat your body like a trashcan. Someone who takes care of himself or herself is always more appealing.

  3. ...and their mental health

    Sobriety doesn't guarantee mental health any more than physical health, but it often communicates self-control and balance. Not everyone who drinks is self-medicating, but when someone's sober, there's a greater likelihood that what you see is what you get. Everyone has their issues, but dealing with them is admirable and ultimately attractive.

  4. They can always drive and operate heavy machinery

    Their job isn't to be your full-time designated driver -- you're attracted to them, not how they free you up to party -- but love means never having to say, "Give me your keys."

  5. You know they don't see you with beer goggles

    Being certain that a person is with you for you (and not as part of a bender) is a comfort you can't always get when dating under the influence. Non-drinkers make this a non-issue right out of the gate, which means it's typically easier to get comfortable and feel legitimately desired.

  6. They make fewer excuses for their behavior

    Just as sober people don't use alcohol to grease the wheels of attraction, they don't use it as a scapegoat for being a jerk either. The ability to take ownership of bad behavior is way more mature than blaming it on the bartender.

  7. They don't have to wait until the next day to apologize

    Everyone screws up, even people who don't drink. The only difference is that sober people are more likely to apologize on the spot, instead of after 10 hours of sleep and a greasy breakfast.

  8. They've honed some pretty strong willpower

    Whether it's eating healthy, going back to school, earning a job promotion or just not drinking, there are few things more attractive than voluntarily challenging oneself in order to have a better a life. That is a crucial quality to find in any potential romantic partner.

  9. They don't need alcohol to give them confidence

    Not everyone who drinks is cowering to peer pressure, but abstaining often comes with the kind of swagger you get only from not caring what other people think. It's a sign of a solid person who already feels comfortable with who they are, and that's really something that looks good on everyone.


VMAs 2017