'The Notebook' Writer Nicholas Sparks' Marriage Is Over, Because Love Is An Illusion

Don't worry - there are Sparks-approved ways to get through this.

Remember in "The Notebook" when Allie (Rachel McAdams) and Noah (Ryan Gosling) ended up together forever, because love is for always? Remember in "A Walk to Remember" when Shane West's character named a star after Mandy Moore's, because everything you've ever wished for will always come true and this world is a giant rainbow that's here to let your light shine?

Of course you do, because everybody loves Nicholas Sparks movies (or at least getting together with their friends and making fun of Nicholas Sparks movies). But today we officially learned that the dreamlike love presented in those films can sometimes become a nightmare, as People reports (January 6) that Sparks has separated from his wife of 19 years, Cathy -- also known as the woman who inspired most of his beloved novels.

This has got to be a hard pill to swallow for readers of Sparks' novels -- and fans of his Valentine's Day-release movies -- so to make the news go down a bit easier, here are five things Sparks (and you) can do to land a little more love in your life:

  1. Build a house.

    Even if this doesn't win back your beau like it did in "The Notebook," building a house is great physical activity. Also, when it's finished you'll probably feel really good about yourself, because you just built a house.

  2. Buy a rowboat. Use it.

    As we learned in "The Lucky One" (and "Notebook," "Safe Haven," and "Message in a Bottle") a boat fixes everything -- even if your entire relationship was based on a huge lie.

  3. Get a caring old person involved.

    Young people are curmudgeonly, so we all need an elder statesman like Ellie from "The Lucky One," Dodge from "Message in a Bottle," or Mr. Tyree from "Dear John" to guide us in the right love direction.

  4. Move to a rural setting -- in North Carolina, if possible.

    North Carolina was put on this earth for one reason -- to create and foster intimate, long-lasting love. Once you leave the confines of its coastal region, you're dooming your relationship to the perils of the outside world.

  5. Get a ghost friend.

    Sometimes the only person who can help you move on is a dead person. Spoilers.