Let's just get right to it: Andy Cohen turned Lady Gaga’s pee into perfume. Seriously. The Watch What Happens Live host admitted to Howard Stern yesterday that when Mother Monster couldn't make it to the restroom during his show nearly a year ago, she went number one in a garbage can and his PA saved it as a "pop culture artifact." When it started to turn toxic (as it does!), his PA found a recipe on how to turn the urine into a fragrance, and—we hate to break it to you—but that's not actually as weird as you may think.
Tons of fake perfumes have already been seized for selling illegal urine-filled scents to the public (yuck), but the origin of that musk smell we're all super familiar with actually comes from a secretion from beavers' castor sacs which is released via—*drumrollllllllll*—their urine. Some of your favorite fragrances—like Chanel Antaeus and Givenchy III—are even filled with the stinky stuff. YUM!
But when it comes to humans, is it possible to create a scent from our own urine? Apparently, so! Andy's PA's pee-fume concoction is actually totally doable. Conceptual artist Cherry Tree turns her urine into perfume quite often, and told The Huffington Post that she applies the same fermenting technique used to distill vodka to her own, um, secretions.
While we don't know Cherry's exact pee-fume making process, distilling vodka is basically broken down into three major components, according to WikiHow:
• You'll need to heat the liquid (in this case, urine) to "a temperature that is greater than the boiling point of alcohol, yet less than the boiling point of water" (around 173° F) inside a still (there are a few options for those, too).
• Then, the vaporized alcohol will travel up into the column or tube of the still.
• When cold water is applied to the column or tubing, the external cooling will cause the vaporized alcohol to cool and condense back into liquid, thus making your perfume.
After the entire process is done, it's totally sterile and smells good. "I was fascinated by how the smell changes depending on what you eat," she said. "For instance, it smells really good after you eat a lot of honey and it smells terrible after eating chicken." Annnd we'll leave it at that.