Was anyone else thoroughly shocked by the fact that this week's installment of "American Horror Story: Freak Show," a Halloween outing called "Edward Mordrake, Pt. 1," was completely murder free? I mean, did they think we needed a break after the tragic deaths of Meep, the unnamed Hanley's Toy Shop victim, Hanley himself, and all of those other people that Twisty killed?
Because we didn't. "Mordrake" was a bit slow and draggy for an "AHS" Halloween outing, probably due to the show's extra-long runtime. Hopefully, they'll rectify the lack of action during "Pt. 2" next week, but in the meantime, we still have some burning questions left over:
1. Who is Edward going to kill?
... And will his afterlife of wandering around from freak show to freak show on Halloween actually be that bad? Wes Bentley's Mordrake was billed as a demon straight from Hell, so it was actually pretty surprising when all he did was sit Ethel Darling (Kathy Bates) down for an emotional, therapeutic talk about her life.
He didn't choose her, though, so it looks like we'll be in for some more fireside freak-chats next week. My money is on the tall-lady Amazon Eve, since we already lost a little guy (RIP, Meep) last week, and none of the main-players should be leaving the roster quite yet.
2. How is Twisty choosing his victims?
Another surprise last night came when Twisty (John Carroll Lynch) did not kill the beautiful young mothers or the elementary-aged angelic little girl, instead carefully selecting the teen boy to add to his trailer-chamber of kept horrors. Unlike Dandy (Finn Wittrock) who will seemingly torture anyone who enters his line of vision, there's a method to Twisty's madness -- but what? And why is he keeping teen boy, pre-teen boy, and fiery young college-aged girl alive in his trailer?
What's your endgame, Twisty?!
3. Will Dandy finally kill?
I'm personally terrified for Dandy's seemingly inevitable first rampage. Unlike Twisty, who is fantastical and larger-than-life, Dandy seems like a 1950s, Ryan Murphy-fied version of a bored, rich frat boy you might meet at USC. That poor, beautiful blonde girl in the trailer has already gone through so much -- I'm hoping she escapes Dandy's new knife-on-a-stick toy, but "outlook not so good" on that one.
4. Is Dot going to lose it?
Boy, the sister drama between Bette and Dot (Sarah Paulson and Sarah Paulson) sure amped up fast, didn't it? That dream (for Dot) and nightmare (for Bette) was a high point in the episode, but it also set Dot up as the surprisingly more unstable head on those shoulders. What will she do when she finds out that Jimmy (Evan Peters) is attracted to Lady Esmerelda (Emma Roberts)? Which sister will strike the other first?
5. What will happen to Esmerelda when she gets found out?
Props to newcomer Esmerelda for promptly identifying Elsa's (Jessica Lange) weakness -- vanity, of course -- and using it to earn a place on the Freak Show roster, despite her only freakish quality being her ability to tell devastating lies with a straight face. I have no doubt in my mind that she'll be sussed out soon enough (maybe by Dot, who already has a "the boy is mine" style reason to hate her) and have a strong feeling that things won't end well for the prettiest freak of the bunch. (At least it probably won't be as bad as what happened to Roberts on "Coven." Yeeesh.)
6. But what about Denis O'Hare's 13-inch penis?
Not enough attention was paid to this news. We need more O'Hare penis, please.