I hope this letter finds you well, and why wouldn't it? You're Rihanna, the most exciting pop star of our generation.
I'm not sure if you've noticed or not, but we're well into autumn and all the things that make the fall everything that it's supposed to be are here. The leaves have started to change color in New York, every where you turn the illuminati is trying to sell us pumpkin spice and of course we're just weeks away from getting that new Rihanna album.
Oh, wait, there is no Rihanna album.
It was November 20, 2009, when you hit us with Rated R and claimed ownership of the 11th month of every calender year. It was arguably your most anticipated album at that point in your career; you cemented your place in music with Good Girl Gone Bad and here you were with a follow-up ready to prove you can do it again.
The very next year you came right back with Loud and then in 2011 you released my personal favorite Rih LP, Talk That Talk. I still close my eyes and listen to "Watch n' Learn" and pretend that you're singing to me, but that's another letter for another time.
By 2012, it became clear that the Rihanna reign just won't let up and you blessed us with Unapologetic in November just as we've come to expect every year (Side notes: "Loveeeeeee Song" is still perfect and you're a G for remaking Ginuwine's "Pony").
OK, so last year came and went without a release from you and I get it, you want to live your life (see what I did there). You've given your fans so much since you came into our lives back in 2005, you deserve a break. Go ahead, girl, go gain some new experiences and come back to us in November 2014, or at least that's what I thought.
We're almost halfway through October and there's no single, not even a hint of a new album and that has me a bit unsettled. Unless you're going to give us a surprise album. If that's the case, just toss me a wink in your next selfie, don't worry I won't tell anyone.
Honestly Rih, not to be pushy, but it'll be great to get an album from you soon. Things just haven't been the same without you.
P.S. I know you don't give very many interviews these days, but your boy right here is pretty good at 'em. Just ask Hov.