For a show on The CW starring some of the most attractive men on the planet, it's not often that the intrepid heroes of "Supernatural" bare their assets for its legion of female fans.
Jared Padalecki, however, takes the bullet more often than his castmates, having been shirtless on a number of delightful occasions for such important plot reasons as that time he needed to take a shower to that time his soulless self needed a shirtless workout in his abode, Derek Hale-style.
Season ten of "Supernatural" premieres October 7, and to celebrate that fact, here are 11 of Sam's most glorious shirtless moments -- in chronological order, because this is a serious and scholarly examination.
1. That Time Sam Was Fresh From The Shower:
Bless this first gratuitous peek of Jared Padalecki's bod after he left Stars Hollow behind him.
2. That Time Sam Did The Beast With Two Backs With An Actual Beast:
Just one in a long line of ladies who was cursed by Sam's downstairs region, Madison the werewolf was not long for this world after her penchant for heart-eating was discovered and she begged Sam to put her down like Old Yeller.
3. That Time Sam And Ruby Got It On:
We know that filming sex scenes is supposed to be awkward, but we're betting that this future real-life married couple didn't mind too much.
4. Seriously, Though -- How Hot Was That?:
Is it warm in here?
5. That Time Sam Played Doctor:
On the hunt for a siren, Sam got a little sidetracked by a sexual interlude with one of their suspects. Shockingly, not only was Dr. Cara Roberts not the siren, she also got to survive the experience of a) being a woman in the "Supernatural" 'verse and b) having had sex with Sam. Miracle!
6. Hey-o -- That Time Soulless Sam Did A Shirtless Workout:
In one of television's most spectacular moments, Soulless Sam (bless his soulless heart, for he will forever be missed) engaged in a shirtless workout for no reason. Seriously, none. It was delightful. Afterward, he paid a hooker who slipped him her number. SAME, GIRL. Same.
7. Oh, Did You Like That Pull-Up? Here It Is From Behind:
8. Here's Soulless Sam Doing A Sit-Up:
9. And Here's Soulless Sam Doing A Push-Up:
All the -ups, really.
10. That Time Soulless Sam Got It On With A Hippie:
Hippie not pictured. Pictured instead: Sam putting on his v-neck and fluffing his voluminous, soulless hair in the process.
11. That Time Sam Was Shirtless In Bed After A Rendezvous With Amelia:
Apologies to Sam for reminding him of the normal life he'll never have, and apologies to the "Supernatural" fandom for forcing them to relive the most boring relationship and sideplot ever. Ever. (Sorry, Amelia.)
Fellow scholars of shirtlessness will note movement in the left pec, mirrored in the shower scene above. I need to go to church.
BONUS ROUND: That, Like, One Time Dean Was Shirtless:
Here's one of (sadly) few times we saw Dean's supposed ladies' man ways in action. Sure, there was a memorable shower scene in season nine and a shirt-lifting, wound-inspecting scene in season four after Castiel gripped him tight and raised him from perdition, but this was our most glorious gift ever.
#SorryNotSorry to the Winchester bros for our scholarly pursuits in the noble field of shirtlessness on television! It's a tough job, but somebody's got to do it.