Can you even imagine a time when Jennifer Lawrence was not in our lives? The days before a badass, inhumanly talented woman who somehow managed to top Hollywood's A-List by the age of 22 -- while also emerging as a voice of reason for the people -- was around to make the world seem just a little bit brighter? A little more, I don't know, covered in delicious Cheetos dust?
Yeah, we can't either. Those were some dark times, man.
So to celebrate JLaw's 24th (yep, you read it right -- she's still much younger than us) nameday on August 15, we volunteer to represent District MTV News to reminiscence on 24 times this Oscar-winning dynamo was the life's greatest Tribute:
1. The time she won the Best Actress Oscar.
Why not start on top?
What were you doing when you were 22 -- studying for finals? Spending your first post-grad summer at your parents' house, searching the job boards for your first 9-to-5? That's cool. Jennifer Lawrence was winning an Oscar.
2. The time she pooped her pants.
Now that we've reached the top, let's head straight down to the bottom. JLaw's bottom. It doesn't get more JLaw than the time Letterman asked her why she'd been hospitalized before her big "Hunger Games: Catching Fire" premiere, and she admitted to having a "fulcer." (If you don't know what that is, just be warned that you might not want to.)
3. The time she copped to loving the Kardashians.
Now if she starts playing Kim Kardashian's Hollywood, she's really be one of us. Can I borrow some K-stars, JLaw?
4. The time she flipped dieting the bird.
Actresses and normal women alike feel the pressure to be in perfect shape, so it's beyond refreshing when an icon like Lawrence is honest about the crap she goes through in Hollywood. During an interview with Harper's Bazaar, Lawrence recalled the time she was told to lose weight to lose her career... and straight up just didn't.
"It was just the kind of s---that actresses have to go through," she said. "Somebody told me I was fat, that I was going to get fired if I didn't lose a certain amount of weight. They brought in pictures of me where I was basically naked, and told me to use them as motivation for my diet. They thought that because of the way my career had gone, it wouldn't still hurt me. If anybody even tries to whisper the word 'diet', I'm like, 'You can go f--- yourself.'"
(However, it's also important to note that Lawrence is not one of those stars who claims to have a perfect figure despite sitting on the couch eating pizza and watching "Scandal" all day. She admits that she has, and enjoys, a workout routine -- which is wonderful, healthy, and oh-so-JLaw.)
5. The time she needed fries with that -- on the red carpet.
Speaking of not dieting... JLaw is not one to go hungry during the most important Hollywood event of the year. However, she is wise enough not to supersize it when she goes to Mickey D's. Too much of a good thing is never a good thing, you know?
6. The time she said Kristen Stewart could take her down.
We're not sure if we believe it, but some humility never hurt anyone, you know?
7. The time she chopped off all her hair.
Long, flowing locks has been a culturally mandated beauty requirement for young actresses for decades, so it was great in 2013 when Lawrence was all, "who needs hair?"
8. The time she reminded us that we're all defying gravity when you really think about it.
Walking is hard.
9. The time she managed to do it all over again the following year.
Bonus points for introducing the world to the "best friend as fall-breaker" idea.
10. The time she gave us her best Snooki.
Who doesn't love "Jersey Shore"? Lawrence sure does, and she proved it by giving us a pretty decent Snooki impersonation back in 2011. "Where's the beach?!" We're not sure, JLaw. We're really not sure.
11. The time she lived the dream.
It's great to know that even mega-famous actresses hate wearing pants. Pants are the worst. Seriously, can we talk about pants?
12. The time she called Hollywood's most powerful figure an idiot.
Now that's when you know you've made it -- when insulting Harvey Weinstein for all the world to see has literally no consequences.
13. The time she called Bradley Cooper out for his ass-sweat.
"There was always a little wet patch, right on your butt."
14. The time she photobombed Taylor Swift.
The Golden Globes moment that spawned a million memes is definitely not Lawrence's only photobomb, but it's certainly her most impressive. Unless you count...
15. The time she photobombed Sarah Jessica Parker
Most people attend the Met Gala to show off their style, but JLaw's goal for the night seemed to be taking the funniest pictures. So this was definitely her most impressive photobomb then, right? But oh wait, there's also...
16. The time she face-smashed Emma Watson.
Yeah, this one's it. Katniss facially assaulting Hermione Granger was a win for us all. Wingardium Levios YOUR FACE.
17. The time she taught us how to do our jobs.
Lawrence didn't like how MTV News' Josh Horowitz was conducting his interviews, so she decided to take things to the next level and give him a celeb reporting tutorial. How embarrassing!
18. The time she proved that not all actresses are crazy for fashion.
We thought it was a gene they were all born with or something, but nope.
19. The time she showed school spirit on "Monk" -- then later had to relive her pain.
Everyone has to start somewhere, right? Hey, you can't deny that your school mascot seems pretty lame right now in comparison.
20. The time she became real life besties with Josh Hutcherson.
(But really, please tell us what "you don't remember MMMBop" means.)
21. The time she got in a car accident because she thought she saw Honey Boo Boo.
Are you also noticing a recurring reality show theme, here?
22. The time she reacted appropriately to Jack Nicholson.
"Yeah, you're being really rude."
23. Four words: "Live and Let Die."
Did this scene alone earn Lawrence her third Academy Award nomination for 2013? It hasn't been confirmed, but we're going to go with definitely yes.
24. The time she won the Hunger Games.
This wasn't necessarily in real life, per se, but it was still a major accomplishment. Just picture us holding up the three middle fingers on our left hands to you, Katniss. Because we are.