So you know when you discover a new artist and you can't wait to go out there and spread the gospel of said artist to all of your friends -- you know, the people who hang on your every word and trust each and every gold-gilded opinion?

Well, today you're all my friends, guys, because I can't wait to tell you about this new act Lowell and why you need to get into this candy-colored, deep as f--- singer ASAP.

Here is how I imagine our conversation going. Also there are snacks. Imagine the snacks as well. And lemonade. I might also be holding and petting a cat. OK. I'm done now. Let's go:

What's a Lowell? I think you mean "who." Lowell -- a.k.a. Elizabeth Lowell Boland -- is basically your new obsession.

Um, why? I'm pretty stoked on Lorde right now. And I'm way busy waiting for Grimes' next album. I'm sure there's room in your black heart and ADD-addled brain for one more amazing pop star who refuses to be corralled by this mainstream-swimming world of ours.

OK, cool. What song do I need to listen to, like, right now? Oh, man -- that's way hard. First off, there's her EP I Killed Sara. V -- you should listen to basically all of that, but especially "Cloud 69."

Then you need to check out two new tracks off of her upcoming LP, We Loved Her Dearly, out September 16: the Lana Del Rey-come-Grimes-come-eff-it-no-comparisons-she's-an-original "Summertime" and "I Love You Money," which is basically the most danceable song about the green ever.

Oh, wow -- these jams are pretty good. So, what's this girl's story? Um, it's an amazing one. She used to be a stripper, for one thing.

Like Kathleen Hanna? Yup. She went through kind of a rough period there -- she "went off the deep end with drugs," she's said -- and starting stripping. “I Killed Sara V.” actually refers to her former stage name. “I saw a whole world no one else has seen, which influenced my writing,” she told The New York Times. “And I learned a lot of great slang.”

Oh man, like what? "Rusty Crusty" -- which apparently means a dude who fails to pay at the strip club. That term pops up in "I Love You Money."

Wow. That's pretty heavy. Definitely -- the whole song is about having power over the men in the room and taking their cash. But it's infinitely danceable as well.

So that's what's unique about her, right? What?

Well, that she's so f---ing catchy, but also really, really worldly and thoughtful? Now you're getting it.

I'm pretty sold. Is there anything else I should know, though? Well, apparently she has synesthesia....

Syn-a-what? Basically a condition where sound and vision are kind of the same thing.

Whoa. I know, right? I bet that donut in her promo pic sounds just like her tunes...

Delicious and mysterious, in that it's floating in mid-air for apparently no reason? Totally.

So when can I see her? I wanna see her! She's touring this fall! Stay tuned!