Christopher Walken, lest you forget, is a goddamn legend. He's a hero of weirdos and the delightfully strange alike. And on Sunday NBC announced that he would helm the role of Captain Hook in their live broadcast of "Peter Pan," which may be the best casting decision a network has ever made. (Not that we're being hyperbolic or anything!)
"He might be the first tap-dancing Hook you've ever seen," NBC chief Bob Greenblatt told TV critics at the Television Critics Association Summer Press tour NBC panel event on Sunday morning, no doubt to the glee and euphoric glow of everyone in attendance. Because — hoo boy — do we ever want to see THAT. Who better to play the baddest baddie in all the land than the weapon of choice himself, eh?
Now, for those of you who somehow grew up without any knowledge of Peter Pan — and if you did what sort of childhood did you have, no judgement but jeez? — it tells the story of a fun-loving and spritely young lad with a penchant for flying and a determination not to grow up. Captain Hook is his arch nemesis, a pirate captain on the good ship Jolly Rodger who was left sans-hand after a fight with Peter resulted in it being cut off — hence the moniker "Hook." A nearby crocodile nabbed his hand, and now pursues the Captain in hope of finishing the meal. Lucky for Hook he always gets a head start as the croc swallowed a ticking clock that alerts him of its presence.
Now, we could regale you with stories and interview snippets and performances to prove to you why this man must — nay, needs! — to play the good ol' Captain MissingHand, but why do that when we can shower you with GIFs that are just as, if not more so, effective?
This is the Internet Age, after all. We know what you people want. So let's bring on the GIFs:
He Will Out-Dance Everyone Like a Motherfu—
Because Seriously, The Man is a Dancing Machine
A Serious One
And He's Seriously Electrifying
He's Also Pretty Scary
...And Super-Duper Erratic
To Say Nothing Of His Undeniably Unsettling Allure
And Really Good at Being Bad
But He's Also Not Afraid of Being Goofy
Nor Does He Shy Away from Saying What He Feels
A bad guy with which you'll always know where you stand? That's certainly a bonus.
...Did We Mention the Man Can Dance?
Plus He's a Stone-Cold King of the Weirdos and That's Definitely a Compliment
He's Guaranteed to Blow All of Our Minds, Collectively:
We're so excited and we just can't hide it. Thanks for doing us a solid, NBC.