Ever since Robin Thicke and Paula Patton announced they were separating earlier this week, “Mr. ‘Blurred Lines’” has spent every waking minute trying to win his back his wife … or, at least the waking minutes that include TMZ cameras and paying audiences .
Clearly, he’s pulling out all the stops; but just in case his pleas to Patton aren’t working, we in the MTV Newsroom are willing to help get the couple back: We’ve plumbed the depths of our cold, dead hearts and come up with a list of surefire ways Thicke can rekindle the flame. What can we say? We love love.
Grow His Hair Really Long, Become A Bike Messenger: Yes, this is basically the plot of the “When I Get You Alone” video. So what?
Get His Dad To Help: If Alan Thicke was able to successfully navigate the complexities of the 1988 Crystal Light National Aerobics Championship, surely he can fix something as simple as a marriage.
Two Words: Sex Therapy: That album was underrated.
Balloons! Preferably ones that spell out a message of undying love. Or, y’know, “Robin Thicke Has A Big D–k.”
Have Pharrell Work His Magic Seriously, that dude can do anything.
Just Blame Everything On Justin Timberlake: People spent a decade confusing the two anyway.
Avoid Miley Cyrus: Duh.