The door? Check. The Wall? Check. The coffee table, stove, counter top, dining room table, stairs and bedroom? Check (6x).
"PYD PYD PYD, I'mma put you down," Bieber whispers over a watery heartbeat throb in the intro, before he gets down to real business. "From the door to the wall/Coffee table girl get ready/I'mma put you down (PYD PYD PYD)/All the way down (PYD PYD PYD)/From the stove to the counter to dining room table are you ready?"
The promises keep coming, as the action moves up to the candle-lit bedroom ("brace yourself"), to a Dr. Seuss-like series of vehicular locations ("On a plane, a train, an automobile doesn't matter"), with Bieber serving up his falsetto best to prove to his lady that he's going to give her the "best you've ever had."
The backing track never really climbs out of a low gear, gently rolling under the singers' voices in a low keyboard wash with a faint beat in the distance as they go on their sex tours. Bieber's manager, Scooter Braun, posted an Instagram video where he informs Bieber (who appears to be in the middle of shooting a video) that the song has finally been released, causing JB to freak out and run off the set.
As he proved on "Saturday Night Live" when he put Lady Gaga down on the ground and did some heavy simulation, Kelly is not afraid to turn his freak game all the up. So, nice try Justin, but when it comes to the second verse, let Mr. Sexasaurus himself tell you how it's done.
"On the roof, balcony, we don't care who sees," Kelly adds in his signature buttery vocals, promising to take the party to the parking lot after the club, where, by the way, he's been doing "forensics on your body."
Dr. Kelly can tell from your walk that your man hasn't been treating you right, so he's going to, yes "PYD" until you're cheering his name. The 4:25 song reaches its peak near the end when Bieber and Kelly intertwine their voices on some ad libs where both promise to "PYD," as if they're challenging each other to see who can close the deal in the freakiest way possible.
Though the song just went on sale, Bieber already has one huge fan, Gaga collaborator and EDM star Zedd, who wrote, "Since there's so many people talking sh-- about music they haven't even listened to I'll just say it 3 more times in a row: I LIKE THE NEW JUST BIEBER SONG."
I LIKE THE NEW JUSTIN BIEBER SONG— Zedd (@Zedd) November 18, 2013
Kelly was also excited about the tune, saying before it hit, "My track with @justinbieber drops at midnight tonight. Excited about this one, it's gonna be another classic."
"PYD" follows "Recovery," "All That Matters," "Hold Tight," "Heartbreaker," "Bad Day" and "All Bad" in his series. In addition to releasing new music, Bieber will also be gifting fans with his upcoming documentary/concert flick, "Believe." The Jon Chu-directed movie will hit theaters on Christmas Day.