Pop Princeling Justin Bieber must have been straining under the weight of his massive stardom — and perhaps smarting after the lashing he suffered at the hands of Zach Galifianakis — during his recent trip to China, as instead of dancing up the Great Wall on his own two hightops, he was carried by his burly bodyguards. This case of a giant hoisted on the shoulders of other giants made MTV News wonder: Where else in the world could Bieber be carried?
We’re not sure what the circumstances were surrounding Bieber’s Cleopatra act — Twitter user @BelieveTourUpdates tweeted evidence of the occurrence Monday (September 30) with the caption, “Justin being carried by his bodyguards up the Great Wall of China today in Beijing, China.” (The tweet and others containing images of lofted singer have since been deleted.) Bieber, himself, shared the below Viddy that same day, featuring the pop star dancing with an unnamed baby. Whether said dancing occurred before or after Bieber himself was carried like a baby is unknown.
[VIDEO] "Met this little cutie today at the Great Wall of China" – (Justin via Viddy) http://t.co/iCA4XXPsYi
— BelieveTourUpdates? (@BelieveTUpdates) September 30, 2013
Bieber is currently on his Believe Tour — which is why he was in China in the first place — so we imagine he’ll be hitting a plethora of other locations with bodyguards in tow in the coming months. Not to mention future tours in the coming years. Consequently, we’d like to suggest four more landmarks for the Biebs to take in while riding a few heads above the rest. Check them out below:
1. The Pyramids of Egypt
Take that whole “walk like an Egyptian” thing literally, Tutan-B-man — ride above the golden landscape on the ropey shoulders of your sun-strengthed supplicants. We’ll turn a blind Eye of Horus as you bob along, saving your sandaled feet from the scorching sands, dreaming into the evening of how to answer the riddle of the wise, staring Sphinx.
2. Niagara Falls
Homeward you will ride, fair Bieber, when Niagara Falls comes into view — cascading across the border of Canada and New York. Feel the fresh spray on your face as you take in the mighty waters, there on the shoulders of your proud men at arms, surveying all that glitters in your domain.
3. The Eiffel Tower
Bonjour, mon petit chou, Bieber! Êtes-vous fatigué? Then climb onto the shoulders of your two amis, and stand with them under the twinkling lights of Paris’ greatest attraction! Magnifique!
4. Times Square
The Big Apple! The streets teeming with humanity and hustlers in off-brand character suits — no, Elmo, I do not require a hug! We wouldn’t blame you, dear Bieber, if you allowed your bodyguards to hoist you above the hustle and the bustle and the steaming piles of garbage. All that we ask, sweet Princeling, is that if you look down among the huddled masses and see us struggling to circumvent the wiles of the strumming, smiling naked cowboy, is that you take us with you, sir. Take us with you. For we are weary and the road is long.