Mister Cee Addresses Sexual Scandals In Emotional Return To Hot 97

'I have been in denial for a very, very long time,' the legendary DJ admits, retracting the resignation he made a day ago.

One day after he tendered his resignation from his long-running "Throwback at Noon" Hot 97 show, Mr. Cee took to the station's morning show to come clean about receiving oral sex from a transgendered man, and at the behest of station program director Ebro Darden, he rescinded his resignation, saying emphatically, "We gon' do 12 (noon) today."

"I am tired of trying to do something or be something that I'm not. I'm tired," the 20-year veteran DJ said. "Have I lied about getting sexual fellatio in a car with a transsexual? Yeah. I have lied about that."

After a YouTube video surfaced containing audio of the disc jockey born Calvin LeBrun soliciting a transsexual, he denied the allegations and resigned. But Ebro, who didn't want his legendary DJ to abandon his post, stressed that the station doesn't turn its back on people and convinced Cee that he owed it to listeners to be "real" and "transparent." Cee played a major role in the careers of the Notorious B.I.G. and Big Daddy Kane during his reign.

"I feel bad for the listeners that it did take a video for me to say this because I have been in denial with this for a very, very long time, a very long time," Cee said. "Do I consider myself gay? No, I don't consider myself gay. Even with me saying that, I know I'm still in denial. I know that I'm still in denial because I know that I love women, any women that I been with me know that I love women, but occasionally, I get the urge to have fellatio with a transsexual man that looks like a woman. But then I'm saying I'm not gay because I haven't penetrated a man."

Oddly enough, Mister Cee knows the man in the video, but doesn't know why he wanted to hurt him by releasing it.

"The person who I was in the car with, I know exactly who that person is," he said. "I honestly don't know like I told you yesterday and I went on the air yesterday that video is an old video probably like the end of last year. The situation that happened in May with the undercover male officer, everything that I told you back then was the God's honest truth. I went to court Monday and the charges was dropped. I have not been involved in any type of activity since probably the beginning of the year so I've been moving forward trying to move better but it's almost like the Anthony Weiner situation."

Throughout all of the accusations that came to light, the man known as "The Finisher" tried to protect himself for "the wrong reasons," the most important of which being wary of how he'd be judged by the streets. Breeze scoffed at the notion that his DJ had to "categorize himself" with an emphatic "Eff the streets" comment and pleaded once again for Cee to reconsider his choice to leave the station.

"We'll see what happens after this," Cee explained. "And honestly that's been my dilemma all this time. Am I still gonna be looked at the same way? Am I still gonna be (cries). My whole fear of this whole thing of what I've been going through is most importantly my family. I don't talk about my family too much. My whole thing was about making sure my family was gonna be all right 'cause when I tell you I'm gonna be all right, I'm gonna be all right."

Even though he wondered how he'd go on and keep doing the thing he loves most, spinning the best in hip-hop, Mister Cee manned the boards like he'd always done so expertly in years past, dropping fire mixes and shouting out all of his listeners for holding him down.

"I am humbled to be back in this building," he said during his post-confession broadcast. "I am not gonna drop the ball again. The truth will set you free. It took me too long to realize it but I know it now."

And just like that, the beat goes on.