During her inaugural season, Lovato brought a fresh and feisty perspective to the show, often facing off with fellow judge Simon Cowell. But earlier this year, her Lovatics were surprised when the “Heart Attack” singer revealed that she should have given herself more time to heal her public struggles before starting on “X Factor.”
During “Live From MTV,” Lovato opened up about what she meant by that statement and how, even though she’s been out of treatment for more than two years, she still deals with her issues every day.
“I have had my ups and downs with recovery, and it’s not been a walk in the park. It certainly didn’t stop after I went to rehab where the emotions were still there and what I did say with that when I did say that, I think people took the wrong idea and said I shouldn’t have done it, the wrong headlines, which is what tabloids do,” Lovato said. “What I was meaning to say was I don’t know if that was the best timing because… and I don’t know If I’m going back to acting… I think someone that’s recovering from an eating disorder can only be in front of the camera so much before it starts to play mind games.”
And now looking back at her first season as a judge, Lovato has no regrets. “I went back to TV, and it was worth it, and it was so much fun,” she said. “But I also did it because not only was it going to help me get through some mental things and some fears, but it also held me accountable to still be that light in other people’s eyes and an inspiration to people.”
Yet, there was a moment before deciding to reclaim her seat, where, like former judges Britney Spears and L.A. Reid, Lovato thought about the possibility of not returning.
“There was some hesitation only because I got so stressed out last year for the live shows because I am such a perfectionist and a control freak. I didn’t want to lose because I’m that girl that’s so competitive with people, and I didn’t want to lose to Simon especially it being my first year on the ‘X Factor.’ Of course, I was out right away,” Lovato said before revealing that she is still in touch with some contestants, including Fifth Harmony and CeCe Frey. “I want to see new talent and I want to be a part of that journey again.”