“I know that if you haven’t thought about how you want to present a very packaged idea of yourself then it can seem like you lack ambition. But, dude, honestly? I can’t,” Stewart says in the issue, which hits newsstands Friday.
“People expect it to be easy because there you are, out there, doing the thing that you want and making lots of money out of it. But, you know, I’m not that smooth. I can get clumsy around certain people,” she added. “Like, if I were to sit down and think, ‘OK, I’m really famous, how am I going to conduct myself in public?’ I wouldn’t know who that person would be! It would be a lot easier if I could, but I can’t.”
With such a spotlight put on her personal life, especially over the course of this summer after she was photographed kissing her “Snow White” director Rupert Sanders , the actress likens her feelings about being on the A-list to the ones held by the Beat Generation, as seen in her next release, “On the Road” based on Jack Kerouac’s novel.
“There is always going to be that seam of people who want things differently to the standardized version,” she explains to the magazine. “It’s not necessarily a rebellious thing, it’s just who they are. That world back then, it just seems freer to me than anything I could ever touch and I’m fully nostalgic for it, even though I wasn’t even alive then… It’s the loyalty aspect of it all. I love being on the periphery with a group of people who have the same values that I do. People who don’t get off on fame, who just like the process of making movies and thrive.”
In the film, she plays the free-spirited Marylou, the teenage wife of Garrett Hedlund’s Dean Moriarty. Speaking to MTV News earlier this year about having to appear nude in the film , the actress admitted that it hardly crossed her mind to get hung up about exposing that much of herself onscreen.
“I wasn’t scared, honestly,” Stewart said. “It’s kind of insane to watch now. I’m like, ‘Who is that?’ But I think — as every actress says when they do this is — it just felt so right. It was so within a different world and so within a different environment that I don’t even really feel — I mean, I am personally connected to it, of course — but it is something outside of myself.”
Check out everything we’ve got on “On the Road.”