‘Ted’ Stars Explain: How Do Teddy Bears Have Sex?

'He's a wild one, that boy,' Mark Wahlberg tells MTV News.

Give “Family Guy” mastermind Seth MacFarlane his first R-rated, live-action feature film about a “living” foul-mouthed teddy bear co-starring Mark Wahlberg and Mila Kunis and things are going to get rather inappropriate rather quickly. Like teddy bears doing sexual things with vegetables, for example.

When MTV News sat down with the cast of “Ted” recently, we asked them to provide detailed explanations for how warm, fuzzy and filthy-minded Ted manages to have sex without the aid of any of the familiar tools, as it were.

“Well, he does a lot with the lips and tongue. A lot. Almost to the point that he’s definitely going to get tongue cancer,” Wahlberg deadpanned. “Yeah, he’s a freak. He does freaky things with vegetables. … He’s a wild one, that boy.”

Kunis started her explanation off with a more audience-friendly description.

“Kids these days like to do what I think is called ‘dry hump,’ so maybe the bear does that. He uses tools,” she offered innocently.

As it turned out, MacFarlane provided the most straightforward-yet-slightly censored answer, possibly because he has to take all “Ted”-related subjects more seriously as the writer/director/voice of “Ted.”

“We haven’t ever really explained that. There’s a scene where you see him having sex with [girlfriend] Tammy-Lyn in the back of the grocery store. We don’t explain what’s going on in there,” MacFarlane said. “They are in a grocery store, there is a lot of produce and vegetables available, which, depending on what kind of imagination you have, could be a part of the process. I like to keep it sort of vague.”

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