This year's unlikely MTV Movie Brawl champion, "Cosmopolis," doesn't have a set release date for the U.S., but a foreign teaser trailer showed up online on Thursday (March 22). The adaptation of the Don DeLillo novel stars Robert Pattinson as a young multi-billionaire who tries to get a haircut, but ends up on a wild ride in his limousine instead.
Canadian horror master David Cronenberg directed the film, and the (NSFW) 30-second trailer signals a return to his extremely subversive roots.
So make no mistake: We're not in Forks, Washington, anymore.
Here are the five key scenes from the teaser trailer for "Cosmopolis."
Well, you can never accuse the "Cosmopolis" trailer of misleading the viewer. The crazy begins as soon as the trailer starts, when a naked woman aims a laser-guided stun gun at Pattinson's chest and he encourages her to shoot. It's a move that says, "Listen, this movie and this trailer are going to be insane. Brace yourself. And Twilight fans, enjoy shirtless Edward while you can, because he's about to get shot with a stun gun."
We never see the naked woman fire the stun gun at Pattinson, but immediately after, he takes a shot at his own hand with an actual gun. And we see everything. Cronenberg has never shied away from violence or graphic material in general, and the shot certainly reminds us of that. Considering the kind of gore on display in "A History of Violence" and "Eastern Promises," a point-blank gunshot to the hand might be just the beginning.
It's bad enough that Pattinson's character, Eric Packer, does all of these terrible things to himself, but the trailer gives us a glimpse of his wife, played by Sarah Gadon. Sure, it's great that her husband looks like Robert Pattinson, but who wants to put up with the guy shooting himself in the hand and having sex in a limo with someone else? "Cosmopolis" marks Gadon's second Cronenberg movie, having just starred alongside Michael Fassbender in "A Dangerous Method."
Yes, what you're seeing would be a quick shot of Pattinson urinating in the back of his limousine. With so much of the action in "Cosmopolis" taking place over the course of a day, mostly within that car, you have to imagine that Eric's going to have to relieve himself once in a while. You have to applaud Pattinson for taking on what looks like a fearless role after riding so long on a franchise that succeeded on its familiarity.
The easiest way to make a strange trailer even stranger? Throw in a giant rat. We're not entirely sure what's going on here, but it looks like a group of people are carrying a large, fake rodent through the middle of Times Square. Yeah, we don't get it either.
What do you think of the "Cosmopolis" teaser trailer? Leave your comment below!