Nicki Minaj Recalls Pre-Success Suicidal Thoughts

Young Money MC opens up about a dark period in the past, plus big plans for the future in November Cosmo.

[artist id="3055069"]Nicki Minaj[/artist] has soared to the top of the charts and collaborated with pop icons . With all of that success, it’s hard to imagine that the Young Money MC once felt completely down on life.

In the November issue of Cosmopolitan, the Harajuku Barbie opens up about a range of topics, including a particularly dark period when the MC actually considered taking her own life.

“I kept having doors slammed on my face,” Minaj recalled of her pre-fame struggles. “I felt like nothing was working. I had moved out on my own, and here I was thinking I’d have to go home. It was one dead end after another. At one point, I was, like, ‘What would happen if I just didn’t wake up?’ That’s how I felt. Like maybe I should just take my life?”

Having gotten past those low points, the MC tells the magazine that she has firm plans for a bright future. “I will have put out five albums and will have an Oscar and Grammys,” she predicted. “And I will be getting married and, a couple of years after that will have a bun in the oven. … My whole life is about being Nicki Minaj now. It’s a never-ending saga.”

Fresh off the release of her collabo with Willow Smith, Minaj had some words of wisdom to share about the differences between her and another star: Lady Gaga. The Queens native said that while both embrace over-the-top fashion, for the MC, it’s not a 24/7 routine. “I think Gaga is freakin’ dope for that,” she said. “But I can’t be bothered. Give me my sweats. I like transforming from completely raggedy to ‘Ahhh, I’m ready.’ That transformation gives me a high.”