'Glee'-Cap: Gwyneth Paltrow's 'Sexy' Sub Teaches Us A Lesson

Holly Holliday breathes fresh air into this week's episode, and our musical recap.

This week's "Glee" made some of us feel a little confused and funny inside. While the McKinley High kids were learning about the birds and the bees and Fleetwood Mac from Holly Holliday, Jim here made his own discovery: his crush on Gwyneth Paltrow. Now, sing along with him!

Holly Holliday, I think I love you.

The way you teach sex ed to the children makes me meow.

Holly Holliday I know I want you,

But, Gwyneth, in real life you don't arouse.

Holly, I swear

In "Glee" you breathe new air.

You won't need no teacher-Jazzercise

Once I work on those thighs!

Oh, girl...

[Pips-like backup singers: Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh]

Oh, with Will you're a tease.

[Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh]

Emma's throwin' shade, "Step off my man! Bitch, please!"

[Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh]

Awakens Santana's Melissa Etheridge tendencies.

Brit turns her down,

She's bi, with a guy, cue the frown.

Her ladypart's now a ghost town,

But don't be sad, you go-getter,

Just ask Kurt, it gets better!

Oh, girl!

The Warblers up their sex appeal,

Practice Neon Trees with girls away from home,

Kurt's sexy face is far from "Blue Steel"

But it still makes Blaine spurt out some foam.

Oh, "Glee" I find

Your writers lost their minds,

A sex tape with Lauren and Puck

Makes me scream, "What the fudge?!"

[Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh]

Will's tango made me mad.

[Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh]

I've seen sexier scenes on "Cash Cab,"

[Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh]

But it could be I was just jealous that he got to grab

The hot substitute?

She's funny and so cute.

I'm in hot pursuit.

Holly, you're my new addiction,

I don't care that you're fiction!

[Music breakdown, Jim ad-libs.]

I gots to break this down right here right now.v

I'm feelin' all naked and vulnerable with no instruments right now.

So many horny kids at McKinley High, gimme some horns.

[Horns join the track.]

Now, give me piano because I want to tickle some ivories.

[A jaunty piano gets added to the song.]

Give me some organ for the kids out there playin' with their own.

[An organ plays along.]

And how about some acoustic guitar for my lesbian friends.

[An acoustic guitar strums on the track.]

Come to my window!

Come to my window!

Come to my window!

I'll be home soon.

What did you think of this week's "Glee"? Talk about it in the comments.