Ryder left, the Situation got towed and Vinny got it in with his stripper friend a bunch of times. Lots of happenings on the latest "Jersey Shore," but here are my five favorite moments.
5. Fire in the Hole
Sunday dinner got a little smokier than normal this week. Enter the fire department, much to the delight of the girls. JWoww called the firemen "prime-A meat of men" while Snooki admitted, "That's actually one of my fantasies, for a fireman to, like, come rescue me, like, put out my fire literally with, you know, like, a fire outfit on."
But Snooki doesn't need a fireman to cure that burning sensation. (Sounds like she needs penicillin.)
4. The Sitch Itch
The J-Shore crew hit up a club called Space. Then, the Situation tried to hit up one of the patrons, so they were promptly kicked out. But not before Pauly D snagged two honeys for him and his main man. Unfortunately, one of them wasn't as DTF as they expected.
When the hookup began, the Situation found out his girl is sober and doesn't have casual sex, to which he responded, "Listen, we don't have to bang. You could just b--- me." (What a problem solver!) Her response: "You told me we were going to hot-tub or something!"
So let's break this down. We had a girl obsessed with a Jacuzzi and an angry dude telling his lady-friend to b--- him. Since when did "Jersey Shore" become a Mel Gibson phone call?
3. Spray It, Don't Say It
You know how if you put peanut butter on your fingers, your dog will lick it off? Well, the Situation and Pauly D are hoping body spray has the same effect on humans. How else to explain their decision to spray their, uh, bare bathing suit areas with deodorant? (Other than desperation.)
2. Don't Call Me Asian!
Ronnie said Sammi looked "Asian," and that set her off. (She's so level-headed, you guys.) As she stormed off, Vinny announced, "Ooooh, tonight's about to get really interesting!"
Except he was wrong. We're talking about Sammi/Ronnie drama. That's the opposite of interesting. Tax code is more interesting than those two bickering.
1. The Hookup Board
Snooki and JWoww had the brilliant* (*word used loosely) idea to create a chart on their communal chalkboard listing off the different "hookup" configurations between "Jersey Shore" castmembers. "We're all gonna figure out if we all swapped spit," JWoww announced.
Not surprisingly, once you map it out, it turns out that they've all exchanged various bodily fluids with each other, in a "six degrees of Kevin Bacon" kind of way.
"We're nymphos!" Snooki exclaimed.
Nymphos? Maybe. Disease hosts? Definitely.
What was your favorite moment on last night's "Jersey Shore"? Let us know in the comments!
Don't miss "Jersey Shore" every Thursday at 10 p.m. ET/PT on MTV.