While fans eagerly anticipate the premiere of Fantasia’s “Behind the Music” episode on Tuesday night (August 24), where the singer will open up about her suicide attempt earlier this summer, she also talked about her overdose on the Gayle King radio show. Fantasia not only discussed her new album with King, she described the incidents that led up to her overdose.
“Well, [there] was so much going on that day, and I think you know that since I’ve been in the industry, there’s always something going on in my life. And I take a licking and I keep on ticking,” she told King. “I’ve never really had the chance to release. … I wasn’t prepared. I wasn’t prepared for Hollywood … I have feelings, I do. I’m human. But I cover them up well and I keep them moving like nothing is bothering me.
“It was so heavy that day. … I told Brian [my manager], ‘I feel like I’m about to have a nervous breakdown,’ ” she recalled about the hours leading up to the overdose. “And again, because Brian knows I’m really strong, he says, ‘You got it. We can get through this.’ I just became overloaded that day.”
And with rumors of a relationship with a reportedly married man, Antwaun Cook , plaguing her, she retreated, saying that she couldn’t even muster up the strength to go on for her daughter, Zion. “I couldn’t do it for Zion and it just hurt me so bad and I was out of it, Gayle, and I never go to that point. And so I stayed in my room for three days,” she said. “In the beginning [when I took the pills], I wanted to sleep … and I said to myself, ‘If I don’t wake up, that might be good.’ ”
She admits that while the Cook rumors were one of the many factors that led to her breakdown, the relationship wasn’t the only factor. “When I met him, he was separated and in another home. And I don’t think I would have even been attracted to him if he was with his wife,” she said. “I definitely don’t want something that belongs to someone else. I’ve been in a lot of bad relationships. What hit me was everything was so big. It was everywhere and I was afraid that my daughter would hear it. I felt like everybody was taking what they were hearing and running with it, and I just felt like, man, everyone’s against me.”