Tila Tequila has been taking to Twitter to pour out her feelings about the death on Monday of her fiancée, Johnson & Johnson heiress Casey Johnson. In a series of emotional tweets the "Shot at Love" star (born Tila Nguyen) has been sharing her grief with followers about Johnson's sudden passing at the age of 30.
"I miss her so much. Can't stop crying," Tequila tweeted Tuesday night about Johnson, to whom she said she was engaged last month following a whirlwind romance. "Haven't slept for days. ... My entire house is filled with her stuff. I'm in bed without her here.
"You are my Angel now ... I know u are watching from above," Tequila wrote. "I promise u that I will continue our dreams we planned 2gether." Though she signed off early Wednesday morning by saying she was crawling into bed with Johnson's dogs, she asked followers to rouse her up by 10 a.m., because "it's hard to wake up during depressing times." Just a few hours later, though, she lamented that she was struggling to fall asleep alone in her bed and wondered if Johnson's spirit had visited her.
"I had a strange dream about her earlier as I was dozing in and out of sleep," she wrote early Wednesday morning (January 6). "I wonder if that was really her coming back to say goodbye?" After trying to fall asleep again, Tequila admitted that she shouldn't be online at this time of grief, but that "this is the only place I can find some temporary solace. I miss her so much. Sooooo much. Didn't get 2 say goodbye ... We used to tweet each other while lying right next to each other in our bedroom. But now I tweet alone. Unbearable pain."
At one point, a despondent-sounding Tequila said she would have to move out of her house because it was a "huge dark reminder" that Johnson — whom she calls her "wifey" and "Mrs. Casey Nguyen" — was gone.
But by mid-morning on Wednesday, Tequila was involved in a vicious Twitter battle with blogger Perez Hilton over his postings regarding custody of Johnson's adopted daughter, Ava-Monroe and his comments about Tequila's behavior following Johnson's death. Both sides took repeated hard shots at each other, with Tequila threatening to take Hilton down with a new gossip blog she claimed she will be launching soon.