Let's be honest: Talking openly and honestly about sex isn't easy. In fact, it can be downright awkward and embarrassing. But it's important to have direct talks with your partner about sex. Why? Because it can help protect you from sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and unwanted pregnancy. It can also help you see eye-to-eye on sexual issues and avoid unpleasant surprises and hurt feelings later.

Talking with your partner about touchy subjects can even build trust and intimacy in your relationship. After all, being honest about sex shows that you care about your partner and his or her health. And you might just find that you're both worried about the same things. Believe it or not, talking about intimate issues does get easier with practice. The more experience you have with spilling the beans about your sexual concerns and habits, the more comfortable you'll become with the whole subject. And that's a good thing. After all, if you can't talk about sex, should you really be doing it?

Okay, now that you've read about why to talk about sex, here's some tips for how to talk about it.

How can I talk with my partner about safer sex?

Ideally, start talking about safer sex before things get all hot and heavy between you. Prepare ahead of time by thinking about the questions you want to ask your partner and the information you want to share about your sexual history. Then pick a time and a place that's relaxed and comfortable, one where you're both fully dressed and you intend to stay that way. To break the ice, you could talk about friends who are having sex or bring up something you heard on the radio or saw on TV. Sometimes it's easier to bring up the subject of sex by making it less personal. But at some point you'll need to get personal. So it might help to say something like, "This is hard for me to talk about and it may be for you too, but I want to talk to you about sex." Be sure to tell your partner that you really care for him or her and that's why you want to discuss this important subject. Then, you can begin to hash out what you're both willing to do and what you're not. Are you both ready to have sex? Are you scared? What do you both want from the relationship? If you're already having sex, how are you going to stay safe?

Talking about condoms

If you decide you're ready to have sex, talk about condoms and using them to protect yourselves from STDs, HIV and pregnancy. Sometimes it's easier if you both agree that you'll help each other to use condoms every time, so that it's both of your responsibilities.

If your partner says that condoms ruin sex, suggest that you try using different types of condoms and lubricants (remember, no oil or vaseline, because these break down condoms! just use water-based lubricants. You can usually find a whole range of these in the condom section of a drug store). But make your bottom line clear -- if there's no condoms, there's no sex.

Talking about STD/HIV tests

Another thing to talk about is getting tested for STDs and HIV. You may think this is not a problem for you, but did you know that half of new HIV infections and two out of three new STDs occur among people under 25? Many STDs don't even have symptoms in the early stages, so you or your partner might have an STD and not even know it. This is something you've got to talk about!

However you bring it up, think of this talk as a chance to share information and facts and you'll probably feel a lot less pressure. You might want to suggest that you go to a local clinic together to get tested for STDs and HIV so that you can both find out if anything's going on and stay safe. Once you do the hard part of starting the conversation, your partner might feel more open to talk about his or her sexual history too.If you need to tell your partner that you have a sexually transmitted disease, it's a lot easier if you simply present the facts that you found out that you have chlamydia or herpes and that you want to be extra careful so that he or she doesn't get it. Emphasize that you're telling your partner about this because you care about him or her. It might even help if you brush up on facts about your STD by clicking here; that way, you'll know the answers to any questions.

If your partner has a hard time with knowing you have an STD, give him or her a little time to digest the news. It may help to give your partner the National STD Hotline number 1-800-227-8922 to call for more info. If you've already had sex, encourage him or her to get checked out and tested by a health-care provider. There's no question, sharing this information can be difficult for you and your partner. But remember, it is totally possible to have an STD and still have a safe, satisfying sex life without spreading the infection to your partner.